Today was rainy and cold and I won't deny, a little depressing. I had to take Steven up to the hospital for some pre-surgery labs. I told him he needed to finish up the last of his homework this morning before we left. It was all the "hard" assignments that he's been putting off. He wasn't happy about it. There was one last cursive exercise that he just couldn't bring himself to do. As we were rushing out the door he said, "I'm a little depressed." I stopped for minute and looked at him sypathetically, "Oh, is it the surgery tomorrow?" "No, it's the homework."
Wow, that seems like the least of our problems here! Anyway, he wanted to go to school in the afternoon and he didn't want to miss library day, so we got him up there in time and he even got the book he wanted. He finished it by dinnertime.
We had a nice quiet evening of prayers and family. Somehow we will make it through tomorrow and then the next day. And like every other day, we will go a step at a time.
It sounds kind of crazy, but I really wanted a picture of his legs before the surgery, so here you have them. I can't believe how grateful I am feeling for legs right now--do you all know how lucky we are to have them?
I remember when Steven was just learning to walk. He was only nine months old and he hadn't even learned to balance. I would stand him up and let go and he would just start running. At first he ran straight into the ground and eventually he got a few more steps in before going down. He still didn't know how to crawl but he wanted to walk. It was so crazy to see this little baby with no fear just going for it. That is how he's done a lot of things in his life--he is intensly focused and isn't concerned about perfection--he just wants to get from point A to point B and see what will happen next.
That is my best explanation for his fearlessness about the surgery. He sees it as a step in the process of the cure that has to happen. He will have to learn to walk again and he will fall down many times. But I hope his determination to go places will keep him trying over and over until he has it down.
I will try to keep you posted tomorrow. So many people have lots of questions. Maybe with my longest day ever tomorrow, I can address some of those. We need to be at the hospital at 6am. They will take him into the room around 7:30. My best guess is that he will be in surgery for 8 to 12 hours. We will likely be in the hospital for at least 5 days. And most exciting of all is that by this time tomorrow, that tumor will be history!