Monday, May 14, 2012

Big things

Last year, when Steven was first diagnosed with cancer, I promised myself that I wouldn't stress out about anything that wasn't life or death ever again. But then this spring came along and with it, some life and death situations added along with other stressful things, and all my emotions are so mixed up together, I can't seem to separate out all the stress. It is a bit easier to figure out why my stomach hurts tonight, though, because Steven has scans in the morning.

Before his scans tomorrow, I feel I must fill you in on some fun things going on in our lives. They are fun, even though they bring some stress along with them. First of all, we are having another baby! It is due November 15th. As I watched my kids play baseball in the backyard this evening, with their enthusiastic smiles and beautiful freckles, I felt overwhelming lucky to get another of these sweet kids. (Besides, baseball will be more fun with less ghost runners.) Every once in a while, I have moments of fear that I won't have it in me to be the mom I need for my many kids. But mostly, I am so looking forward to the joys of a little baby and I trust that Heavenly Father will help me compensate for whatever I lack. (And then, there is always Rob, who is a huge help to us all--he makes sure the important stuff gets done, even when I drop the ball.) The kids are all so excited about the baby, especially Steven. He has been hoping and praying for a new baby in the family for years.

And so, kind of going along with the baby news, we also have house news. We are in contract on a house that is a little closer to the boys' school and that is hopefully big enough for our growing family. It is over twice the size of this little rental, so it should feel like a mansion to us. This has been a hard decision for so many reasons, but we feel good about this and I feel very anxious to move. Hopefully we will close on the house in the next few weeks and if we are lucky, we will move in before our trip to Hawaii. We are going to try to paint before we move in, so we'll see how far the adrenaline can go.

These are the main things going on, but along with them are the everyday problems and then watching my sister in her fight with cancer and even having a few health scares of my own. It is so hard to separate out the stress for me because my emotions are so close to the surface and my stomach usually feels terrible and whose to say I'm not suffering from a little post-traumatic stress disorder of my own? But I am making it through. I usually get out of bed :) and I usually take a shower. I can pretty much keep up on the dishes, even if laundry is a little daunting. I usually sleep just fine, though, thanks to pregnancy hormones.

So forgive me that I've been so negligent at blogging. I don't make promises that I will start to write again regularly, either. I will make sure and post the results of Steven's scans tomorrow, though. And maybe since a few of you now know about the scans, we can divide up some of the worrying tonight.

10 comments:

  1. These are big things Sonja, good things, and I'm very happy for you and your family. Can't wait to see the new house...and that new baby.

    It was so fun seeing you twice last week. What a treat for me! Love ya.

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  2. Congratulations on the new baby and new house! You are the perfect mother for your family!! Good luck today, I am sending warm thoughts and prayers your way.

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  3. We are hoping for wonderful news today. And we are so excited for your new baby and house!

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  4. good luck! sorry you have to go through scans.
    We're glad for all the happy things going on in your family!
    sorry. holding baby. cryptic message.

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  5. Congratulations! Such happy news. We will pray that the scans are clear. Your family and Alisa's are always in our prayers.

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  6. Sonja! Congratulations! So excited for you...a new baby...wonderful. So fun to see you (even if very briefly) this weekend. Love to you all.

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  7. I am so excited for you guys. Every good thing for you guys from here on out.

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  8. so much joy! so much stress! it is a lot for one human to take. keep up the good work, one day at a time!

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  9. Congrats! Congrats! Congrats! We are thrilled for all of your great announcements! I can't wait to find out where your house is and to have another little Blodgett running around! We sure love your family and we are so happy for you!

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  10. Wow! Such incredible news! Congrats! We'll miss you in the ward. I'll keep up on your blog for sure, and feel free to drop in on ours! Just send me your email address and I can add you!

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