Sometimes I wonder if I should even update the blog with news of good scans. You know I would if they were bad, right? I often think about when Steven was first diagnosed with cancer. I searched the internet for everything I could find about osteosarcoma, including blogs. The only blogs I found were about kids who had lost their battle. It was unnerving. I promised myself that I would keep blogging, especially if Steven did well and survived.
It is hard to keep up a blog, and in the years since he finished treatment, I have gotten less and less faithful. I've said before that in some ways, I just want to move on. But I think about people searching the web, looking for hope after a recent diagnosis and that is why I keep it going, even if it is sporadic.
Having said that, Steven's scans looked good this week. This was the first 6 month interval and it has been so nice to not have to worry so often. This week Steven and Rob went to youth conference and went river rafting. They had a blast. He came home oblivious that he had scans. I also had a busy week and didn't think about them much. Even the night before, I still hadn't been hit with that all too familiar scanxiety that I normally have. I started to worry--what if something bad happens and I haven't been worried about it? (Crazy, I know!) But no matter how hard I tried to worry, I just couldn't. Even the morning of, I ate a full breakfast and we headed over to the hospital.
I'm so glad they were good, and I feel like God spared me some worry this time. We've had our share of worries about Alisa, whose cancer is slowly spreading. She is facing some hard choices about treatment now. We continue to hope and pray for her--she is a living miracle and I have a feeling that more miracles are around the corner for her.