Recently..

Wow, two years ago yesterday, Steven was diagnosed with cancer.  I only thought of this because I was thinking I ought to log on to the blog and then it hit me that we are approaching anniversaries.  Weird.  I guess I thought that I would not forget that day and yet it came and went uneventfully and with nary a thought of cancer.  This is a good thing, I think.

We've had some super busy weeks just doing normal things mixed in with the fun and the not so fun extras.  For one, Steven got his new leg over a week ago.  The bad part is that he hasn't been able to tolerate it very well.  We keep going into Shriners to get it adjusted and leave with hopes that it is fixed, but then hours later he is limping again.  We spent all afternoon at Shriners on Friday and finally his new prosthetist suggested we just start over and cast him for a new leg.  Steven was sick and tired of being there and so he said, "No, let me try it over the weekend, maybe I just need to get used to it."   So I guess we are getting the first available appointment next week and starting again.  Oh well, his old one works just fine now.  He had totally snapped a metal part but the great guys at Shriners fixed it, so at least he isn't hopping around on one foot anymore.

Something fun this week--Steven got an award from the local city for Student of the Month.  We were invited to a luncheon and the principal told everyone what an inspiring kid Steven is and she was right.  Afterward I was congratulating him and he said, "Yeah, but the only reason I got it was because I got cancer."   Ouch.  The thing is, in a way he may be right.  But my argument is that his experiences with cancer have transformed him from great to awesome.  (And frankly, to borrow one of his favorite words, he's on his way to 'epic'!)  

We are all loving Molly (our puppy) more and more all the time.  She has just been so good for all of us.  In the midst of all the chaos that is our life, we can come home to her.   She seems to be learning to be better behaved and isn't too destructive.  She is funny and darling and continues to get me out of bed and get me going, even early in the morning.   And that is kind of important to keep up with this family, so thank you, Molly!

Three months ago, Daniel was born. It feels like I've lived a lifetime since then. A baby was blessed a church today. I didn't even cry this time, but then when it was over, it struck me that today would have been Daniel's blessing day too. And so I skipped Sunday school and went to Daniel's grave to say a little prayer for my baby.

I have been gathering some pictures and thoughts about Daniel for a scrapbook. I came across this one that Alisa took of Addie at the graveside service that I love:

She is trying to catch a snowflake on her way to lay a flower down on Daniel's casket. It looks like hope and beauty and optimism, all the things I am seeking as I try to find some meaning in his death. I've come a long way in three months, but I still miss my little baby.

Some recent pictures of our puppy and our snow. Lots of fun!