If I haven't officially declared my passionate dislike of cancer, let it officially be known. It is a complicated feeling because yes, I realize that there are worse things and yes, there is a lot of growth that comes from suffering. I am just tired of watching people I love go through this kind of refining. If you haven't heard, my little sister, Alisa, had scans this week which revealed cancer in numerous places, including her liver and bones. Thankfully it is not in her brain and thankfully there are several treatment options for stage IV melanoma that she can try, all of which offer some hope. There is a link to her blog on my sidebar if you want more details.
I don't really have anything insightful to say and I even feel at a loss for words and action when it comes to her. She has been so proactive this last year, always doing, saying, or organizing exactly what we need. And then when it is her turn I, who am the only family member with firsthand cancer experience and one of the people closest to her, can't even get out of bed in the morning. Kind of goes to show just how weak I really am.
I thought I realized how much I love her, but these last few days, it has hit me with an unexpected force how important she is to me. She was born just 18 months after me and I would say there is probably no one else on earth who understands me better. But this isn't about me. What I need now are prayers for my sister. I am praying for her to have the strength to face the hard treatments she is facing, and I am also praying that the treatments will work.